Thursday, February 18, 2010

the next 24 hours

The funny thing is, I've never been that worried about tomorrow (beta day). Either it will be negative, in which case I will do as planned: go to a concert that night, a party the next night, and drink like a fish.

Or, it will be positive. In which case, I will go to said events, drink water, and panic until Monday.

Because Monday is when it all went wrong last time. Beta was on Friday: 125. Great number! Yay, pregnant! Weekend: spent fantasizing about nursery colors, onesies, the smell of baby powder, and little dimples, alternating with slight panic about sleeplessness, breast-feeding and, you know, actually having a child.

And then Monday, the number was 127. And the whole thing came to a crashing halt. So it's never been Friday that scares me. Monday, on the other hand, is terrifying.

Because I'm now pretty sure what Friday will bring.


But no pee-stick can save me from the Monday fears. Goal: take it one day at a time. Hope for a good, solid number tomorrow. And then, wait. And pray. A lot.

Thanks to those who gave me photo-tips for the pee stick! Much better. Darker line is, indeed, a bit of a relief.

13 comments:

  1. Yay! Sending positive vibes for a beautiful beta Friday and a glorious beta on Monday!!

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  2. That's a beautiful picture. Many good thoughts for you tomorrow and Monday.

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  3. That is definitely a darker line than yesterday, so Congrats!! I can't wait to hear what your beta number is tomorrow, and I hope that you're able to have a great weekend and not stress, and that come Monday with the next beta your numbers have doubled accordingly. Fingers still crossed for you that this is a sticky bean in there.

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  4. I have my fingers crossed for you as well. Positive thoughts for Monday being one of your best days ever!

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  5. Best of luck tomorrow AND Monday!!

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  6. Best of luck to you!!!! And I'll be sending up tons of prayers for you this weekend, and special ones for that glorious # on Monday! Have a wonderful weekend!

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  7. So last time I said that a positive is a positive and it doesn't matter how dark or light. But I change my mind. Cause this is super dark and I think your level MUST be increasing! Glad you have a bust weekend to help the time pass quickly. (yeah right!) Good luck, good luck, good luck!!!!!

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  8. Thinking about you for tomorrow already. :o)

    I also wanted to let you know that I nominated you for a blogging award, b/c I LOVE your blog. Here is the post with the nomination:

    http://itty-bitty-baby-dreams.blogspot.com/2010/02/i-won-blogging-award.html

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  9. Just came to see what your 'present' life is like after I found you on Creme.

    Good luck tomorrow. Will definitely be thinking big time of you! Big hugs!!

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  10. Congratulations-That looks like a lovely line !!! hoping for great things for Monday. :)

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  11. That is definitely a darker line! You are heading in the right direction! Sending good thoughts your way for today and Monday!

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  12. SUCH A GREAT LINE!!!!

    and, now, for today's, but especially MONDAYs fabulous beta!

    thank you for your sweetness while I freak out.
    So great to have your two lines to aspire to!
    xo
    Kate

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