Sunday, September 23, 2012

nope.

So, perhaps the radio silence from o'er here clued you in, but the beta results yesterday were not good. Negative, to be exact. Definitely not good, although I would still take that over the "first beta positive, second beta disastrous" of 2009.

(I mistyped that last sentence "definitely not god," which has a certain truth to it, perhaps.)

Anyway. We were certainly disappointed. More so than I would have guessed. I have another post about that, but not for today.

Something else momentous happened yesterday, though. On my way out the door to my bloodwork appointment, I waved to my daughter and said, "I love you," which I say many times daily and every time I leave her, and for the first time she said, quite clearly, "I love you, mama."

Definitely God, there.

Thanks again for all the good wishes.
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13 comments:

  1. tireegal68September 23, 2012 at 9:08 PM

    Oh no! That is just a big pile of nothing good:((
    Your daughter, on the other hand, is a shiny happy smart little girl. That's a heart melter, alright!

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  2. jeniciniSeptember 23, 2012 at 10:09 PM

    I'm so sorry. Thank goodness for your sweet little girl...giving mom love just as she needed it.

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  3. MonicaSeptember 24, 2012 at 6:34 AM

    well, dammit. I'm so sorry.

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  4. AmberSeptember 24, 2012 at 7:29 AM

    I hate that!!! But I am so glad your daughter was so sweet at such a needed moment!

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  5. Annie's MomSeptember 24, 2012 at 9:05 AM

    Oh damn damn damn, I am so sorry. But what a gift from your daughter at a much needed time. (((((Shalom)))))

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  6. irrationalexuberanceSeptember 24, 2012 at 9:38 AM

    Oh damn. That sucks and I am sorry. But the "i love you?" Growing your heart three sizes larger barely describes it. I know it doesn't entirely compensate, but it comes really really close.

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  7. kdactylSeptember 24, 2012 at 10:10 AM

    Darn...so bummed for you. Love the love from your little though...how awesome is that? Hugs.
    kd

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  8. PieSeptember 24, 2012 at 10:50 AM

    aw damn. i am so very sorry, and i know exactly where you are right now - it does hurt more than expected. sigh, i wish it were different news.

    but sweet girl, she knows mama needs some (spoken) love today. good girl :)

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  9. BarefootSeptember 24, 2012 at 8:15 PM

    So sorry to hear about the negative....just ugh.

    The first "I love you" is totally magical, though....

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  10. TrinitySeptember 24, 2012 at 11:23 PM

    I'm sorry, friend. From a deep place in my heart.

    Yes, definitely a higher greatness present in these perfectly timed, *perfectly perfect* moments with our toddlers. I can't tell if these moments make the heavy stuff lighter, or if they just make the rest of life that much brighter. I guess it doesn't matter, ultimately--we're grateful for any and all of it.

    Wishing you comfort... X

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  11. rebeccaSeptember 26, 2012 at 7:52 PM

    So sorry dear woman. Wow, the power of words especially those uttered by our little's. Glad you felt love on a day that held such difficult news. Thoughts to you

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  12. jeremyOctober 11, 2012 at 1:24 AM

    Such strong statement to hear for the day.

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